Tuesday, January 13, 2009

random somewhat juicy ass a's

sunday q's got your back...now ask away boos.

Can you be in love with two people at the same time?

if you are lucky and unlucky enough to do so. i think i have the capacity to do it, i just don't have the heart to want to do it. it's fucking exhausting enough being with one person at a time.

Did you vote yay or nay on 8?

hell to nay on that crap!!! let us marry who the heck we want under god and any other religious banner we want. this is america, isn't it? isn't it? as my mom Lo' put it, 'first them, then us.' let them take their rights, ours are next.

What's your favorite food?

curry or ice cream.

Sunday Q, what the hell do you want?

success, extra change in my pocketbook, a handsome fellow i fancy to look after me, me to look after him, family and friends who 'get it', less of the bad, more of the good...

What are you doing tonight?

a sandwich, a stiff drink...dancing, doing the twist at some club in LA, Underground, going to a club my friend is guest dj-ing at.

what is the thing those luscious lips of yours enjoy the most?

cooling soup. just kidding. a new tube of slighltly scented orange, light pink lip gloss tint. kissing someone they want a ton.

Sunday Q, I have a crush on a cute co-worker any suggestions to get him interested in me.

find out if he drinks. establish a happy hour night at your work, a night that you and fellow co-workers get trashed together and talk crap about your boss and work. it used to be wednesdays or thursdays at my old jobs. anyways, create one, go to one. get him to go. invite him. get him tispy, get him toasty and go from there.

if this fella doesn't drink than find out what he does do or what he is acutally into: smoking doobs, painting, kayaking, biking, karate, minus the bear, stock broking...learn what he is into and talk to him about it.

i used to have a crush on this dude i worked with Colin. Mmmmmm, this really tall lad, who had an english accent, nice teeth, and an affinity for v-neck sweaters and working late in the office. the happy hour night was already situated happily on thursdays, and i stayed late one evening sending silly kitten videos to my co-workers which is something i used to do quite a bit when i worked in corporate america. i was paid by the hour back then. anyway i strolled by his office on the way out, looking hot that day my little gray dress, stocking heels, feeling good about it, anywho, i told him about the happy hour night that was in progress. how it was a blast. how they 1/2 price margaritas, free chips and salsa. i told him your usual peer pressure mumbo jumbo. everyone cool is there, and you'll be cool too if you come. he told me he'd try to make it. 1.5 hours later he did. with his girlfriend marissa from our accounting department...knowing that all his cool co-workers were going to be there, he made that happy hour night his dating-marissa debut. yay! for them i got really wasted that night.

How do you prefer to picked up by a guy? I have issues sometimes when it comes to picking up women.

i prefer it when a dude respectfully and politely comes up to me and says something like, "hi. i think your mind blowing pretty, i don't want to kick myself later for not approaching you, nevertheless, my name *******, may i have your number, i'd like to get to know you, take you out to a movie, or a show, or a show or coffee or something."

obviously, i like to go to shows so that's good way to get in with me.

a nice salutation first. tell me you think i'm pretty, this way i know what you are after right away, and you don't end up in friendsville. then say something, that displays your wittiness and hunger for me. then find out if i like you back by asking for my number. get me excited by telling me all the places you'd like to take me, and by adding coffee as a activity we could do together you are telling me that you are truly interested in getting to know me, i have most of my intellectual conversations over coffee or tea, i'll think you're interested in my brains...even though you are probably not, nevertheless, i won't think that you only want poontang, even though you totally do, who doesn't?

which is fine because that is the initial point of dating and marriage any way.

so if a fella says any of the b.s. above to me and happens to be a decent, fun, handsome odd duck with success on his mind...then he'll probably end up with my number...or my myspace profile to say the least.

you are putting yourself out there...but you can't meet people literally or figuratively unless your out there so do it. don't fear the rejection, let it roll off of you like water on a duck's back...

Do ex girl friends ever think about ex boyfriends at all? Even if it the breakup has been quite awhile ago, say about 6 years ago?

we all think about our ex's...some of us do a better job of hiding it than others. your ex-girlfriend has and will think about you for the rest of her life, or up until she get ambnesia or a lobotomy. or maybe she'll meet some incredible guy. he'll sweep her off her feet and she'll forget all about you...forget that you two existed. that most likely will never happen so...i really think you're good. she'll think about you. (ah-you make me wish my ex's are somewhere out there thinking about me.)

Are you a shrink?

gosh no.

If a guy sucks a dick in the middle of the woods, and there's nobody around to hear or see it, is he a gay?

well, he is mos def gay in that forest. especially that forest. that one in particular. at the very least forests give him the freedom to be sexually experiment, forest could possibly make him horney. and since he is in the forest this fellow sucks on whatever he can get in his mouth. being horny in forest is normal. i think it's some what natural, being in the woods has that effect on people...whatever. frick, i have been wanting to go camping for like...forever.

Favorite drink?

non alcoholic: room temperature water. coca cola/egg nog when i haven't had it in awhile. fresh cool coconut milk. alcoholic: yummy cold beer. stella. arrogant bastard...

When you're all alone what really goes thru your mind...

everything...i'm a mad day dreamer....

Do you swallow?

I have...sometimes...pretty sure everybody wants to avoid digesting this tapioca.

What is the most important New Year's Resolution a person can make?

the kind of resolution you can keep...something reachable, something you can exceed, something you can try and really give your all towards. my new years resolutions are: i want to be more involved in my community, and i want to read more, meditate more, walk, hike more, be less sensitive...

Are those lips as deliciously kissable as they look ?


would you be my future ex-wife?

loved to...let me think about it...i don't want to be too rash.

Wow! You look very pretty from what I can see. Nice lips. I'm 30, single, 6 3". My question is easy. Would a girl like you be okay with a guy my size? I'm 6 1/2". Also, I'm uncircumsized. What do girls generally think of that?

thanks love for the compliment! 6 1/2 inches is more than enough sausage for most people. a girl like me would be stoked to have that, as long as it's relatively pretty, it being relatively pretty is kind of a big deal for me...and sure, some of us like'em thick. the rest of us don't mind them thick. you're uncircumsized. so what? actually the first uncircumsized one i saw belonged to this handsome irish foriegn exchange student i went with for a minute, oh college, anyways i didn't mind his...i liked it...i can't speak for every woman.

Where are you ticklish?

my armpits, of course, if done at the tempo and strength. my knees.

What famous person do you look like?

People tell me i look like all kinds of people, their daughters, their cousins, their ex-girls, kelis. rosario dawson. brandy. eve. funny. none of them look alike. it's a complement when this happens.

Do you think you qualified to be a loveline dr. ?

hell yes.

Have you ever dated a black guy?

hell yes. two. no. three. three. yes, I have dated a gaggle of black guys.

If not, would you consider it?

of do you like to be close and make your man feel cared course.

Do you like to be close and make your man feel cared for?

yes...i do. it's hard to be close without appearing clingy. which is the last thing i want to be...but i am.

Do you enjoy a drink on occassion?

I prefer drinks for every occassion.

Do you have kids?


Do you enjoy talking about sex?

yes it's fun.

Do enjoy kissing slow?

yes. the nature of kissing should be a slow act. nothing slows down time better than a kiss. or a hug. XOXO

When are you coming over?

not sure. don't know.

Are you psycho?

no. sometimes...only with the good stuff.

Are you into Asian men?

yes. i went on a date with one asian dude once. would do it again. they don't really ask me out though.

Santa Barbara?

sorry. don't know what that means.

whats up, my first question for you is, would you give an 18 year old male, such as myself the time of day?

yes. wait. i'm not sure. okay, if i met a dime piece 18 year old, who had it all together, and there was a strong physical and mental chemisty, i would mos def give him the time of day. and then some. haven't met one since i was 19.

So Ms. Q, one question I have is what does it mean when I'm trying to get to know a girl and having good convo and then she drops stuff in about how hot some guy is in to her? Or she feels is necessary to get into details about sex she had with some other guy? Or how big his cock is? I am a tall good looking white guy I dont display any gay tendencies why do girls do this? It has happened on many occasions and always makes me embarassed. What do you think? Oh, you look really hot by the way! I love black ladies!!

me too. black ladies are shweet. also me too. men do this to me too. i know why they do it. i do it. i do it when i'm insecure about a guy, when unsure if he is really feeling me or not. i'm test the fella, i'm like, "there's a dude at work who has a crush on me." i want the dude i'm dating to be jealous. but not too jealous, like beat the guy and slash his tires jealous. and we all know if a dude gets jealous he likes you. same for women.

i want the fella i'm dating to like me, i want him to say, "if i worked with you, i'd have a gigantic crush on you. i'd send you origami love notes in an uncreepy way charming way. i'd always let you have the dessert in my lunch."

she feels it necessary to tell you all the nitty gritty about her ex-sex-life because she wants you to desire her, lust for her...better than the other fella did...she wants you to exceed the other guy. i guess that's a clever way to put it. she talks about her ex's sausage size because...again...she wants you to be jealous. she's all, "this guy wants me, and i have had the best sex ever, he had a big one, he was into me, please be into me!" she talks to you about this crap...and i know, this maybe hard to believe, because she wants you. (i will assume for my own self-esteem that the men who did this to me, wanted me too. wanted me real bad.) she sexualizes herself before you because she wants you to want her. she wants you to see how powerful her sex-essence is.

the next time a girl dives in with this jive talk, give her some lame/good/fun compliment, like the origami one i gave you before. tell her how excited she makes you. how you'd out do her ex-men in the sac...or dare i say it, show her, show her your excitement, try to do out do the ex-man...embody the sexual prowl of wolverine. (think hugh jackman, yum!) you can do it love!

Are you some sort of magic 8 ball?

shake me and find out. ask again later.

signs point to yes.

you may rely on it.


thanks. i think.

So anything can be asked? Do you know anything about cars? Mine is making a ticking sound…lol I’m kidding I don’t have any relationship problems .I cant have them cause I’m not in one lol… Are you some kind or Dr. Phil?

yes, anything can be asked. i know a little bit about cars. if you hear the ticking sound as you are trying to start your car, it may be the battery. okay, that's about all i know about cars. you don't have to be a doctor to feel...and want to help. (i just bit seasame street, they have a doctor feel puppet character on there now, who is terrific!)

Do you live in frisco or l.a.?

omfg. i know you don't i? neither.sort of. currently i'm no where in particular planning that next jump.

You are intriguing. Why do you want to answer questions?

thanks. intriguing is good. i want to help...living in this world i come across so many people who are surrounded by people who feel alone or misunderstood, i have been one of these people, turning inward when i really needed a friend, a hand, a hug, looking down when i should have been looking up. silencing myself out of fear when i really should have been shouting, or reaching out at the very least. and all along all i needed was some one to say, "i get it, it's not that bad, me too..."

i feel the need to be this person right now, this is me paying it forward...

Okay. How many lick does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I never figured it out because I get bored and chew it up...lol.

a one. a two-hoo. a thrrrreeee. crunch.

Q: Sunday Q, how come girls where skimpy provocative outfits and then complain when ugly guys hit on them?

my A: women who wear skimpy clothing, do want attention, we do. i am one of these women from time to time. when i'm wearing the hot skimpy provocative stuff, the problem is i only want to be hit on by someone hot, especially when i'm dressed like this. i'm trying to feel sexy, i want to boost up my self-esteem and sometimes, most times excessive head turns from hotties will do that. boost ya' up, exactly what the doctor ordered.

aggressive pervs? no, you don't want them to see you in your skimpy stuff, you don't want your mother to see you, and you certianly don't want any ugmos hitting on you every 15 seconds. basically, you want to appear more beautiful to the handsome gentlemen, to aggresive pervy ugmos, i'll be honest, you still want them to think you're hot...in silence, of course with their eyes closed. so you don't have to see them staring so hard.

are those your real lips? do you like to travel? - adam

yes. yes.

the air speed of a fully laden swallow?

11 meters per second. 'sup know playa? just kidding.

I love the woman I live with...like a sister. I had a lover to take care of me. Will I ever find another lover?

of course you will. everyone has the potential to find a new lover. especially you.(because you practically had two at once. just kidding.) there's always enough time to change whatever you want you are doing or get whomever, or whatever you want as long as you start now. right now!

what is your favorite color?

the deepest, darkest crimson red imaginable.

What is the nature of Nietzsche's theory of eternal return, and how does it compare with hindu and buddhist theories of reincarnation, or of soul transmigration?

not sure...eternal return is the physical rebirth of our entire universe.reincarnation and soul transmigration are spiritual rebirths. so i guess they compare because they are all some sort of rebirth. i don't know.

What is the key of Beethoven's 7th?

I'm going to guess and say D or F.

So you are bored as me so lets see what happens with this: Q. You said you wanted a "good looking old duck" who has achieved something in his life. Lol, when you say this it makes me think of that old rich duck from Duck Tales which brings me too the assumption that you just want someone rich and suave. My questions, how much truth was there in the last two sentences before this one?

i said, an odd duck. not an old duck. i am not a gold digger. i love scrooge mc duck.

Q. As In my first sentence in this message, I assumed you are as bored me. My question, are you at work or somewhere were you just felt like getting creative so created this post which I am responding to?

i'm bored. i'm a artist. i am a writer. and i want a boyfriend.

I'm not sure how many guys (or ladies) have responded to your post, but I'm 100% positive you have gotten some regarding... how shall I put this... "dirty" questions. My question is, what percentage of replies that you have gotten resulted in the just mentioned type of questions?

i would say half and half.

I hope you are not thinking I am some old creepy computer guy, so my question is, how old do you think I am? Just take a wild stab at it, as I haven't given you much material to make an accurate guess xD

i think you are 42, no 38, 19...

I can't put my finger on what type of work you do (or sound like you do), but I don't feel like straight up asking that. Its much more satisfying for me to guess that myself actually =D But for you, let me ask you another shot in the dark question, what career or type of work do you think I am doing?

i'm a writer, artist. i think you are a IT salesman, a carpenter, an alligator wrestler, i don't know...

cutie q, what nationality are you?

black, american, created and sprouted on puerto rican soil.

give me that A like you said you would.

it's hard to give you an A without your lovely Q.

What motivated you to do this?

curious people like you and me. people who need help.

Am I allowed to have more than one Q?

sure. go ahead.

Have you ever played with a friend that Questions game where you can only respond to each other in the form of a question?

i enjoy that game. it's been a while since I have played it.

Do you like those little cherry tomatoes on your salad?

oh boy do i ever.

Do you know something I can do this New Years? I have no plans.

i'm having a few people over, you could do that. you can invite all your peeps over who don't have anything to do. you can meditate on your new year wishes as the clock hits 12:00. you could always walk the streets at midnight, if you live in a nice neihborhood. that's always fun. you can put on your favorite song and do the twist in your socks.

Was it you that cheated on someone, or someone you know?

i've cheated on somebody before, i hate to say it. the relationship i was in was sucking, and i went out with one of my girlfriends, i was her wing man and i ended up meeting someone that night...accidentally. both relationships ended shortly after that. and yes, i do know people that have cheated.

What film have i seen the most?

taxi driver. do the right thing. go. pulp fiction. and i think i watched 'the craft' in college way too many times...

What is the meaning of life?

happiness. your life itself.

How do I Chianti out of a white t-shirt?

use peroxide. dab it on. (check out more of these kinds of q's and a's at my booty, i mean my beauty blog. it's on this page somewhere. THANKS!!! Love!!!)

Can someone still be friends with someone you broke up with?

i think it's possible to still be friends with someone you broke up with. i've done it. my ex-husband really messed me up when we broke up, and for years i pretended he was dead, to cope with his disappearance in my life. then one day he came to visit me, apologized for everything wrong he did, which forced me in turn to apologize about the things i did wrong, and then wa-la we friends like nothing ever happened. i think it depends on the people breaking up, how you broke up, and your ability to let relationships evolve.

Nice lips...what can you do with those lips?

lots of things.

What is your favorite thing in the world?

i'm doing it right now. painting an idea i'm in love with. a hug from someone who really missed you. humor.

What's your favorite place?

i always find myself in kitchens. golden gate park. a hot tub of some sort. the ocean...by far the ocean, the beach...

Are you scared to grow old?

no. most of the elders in my family look really young for their ages. i bet that's why. i am terrified about getting that wrinkly turkey neck i'm going to get when i'm 80 though.

favorite band?

pj harvey band. iimi hendrix experience. beatles. joy division. interpol. the roots...

Whats the difference between an African swallow and a European swallow?

their wing tales or something.

Got kids? I have one.

no. not that i know of. would like to have some...i think one day. don't mind if you have one.

Do you like dark, handsome, strong, muscular, beautifully endowed Italian men?

who friggin doesn't love a beautifully endowed man? who?

What are next weeks lucky lotto numbers?

I don't know...but a 2 will be involved.

Why are most women materialistic?

because we are brainwashed by society in to thinking that materials thing make us happy. men are materialistic too dude.

Why do nice guy's finish last?

because they are so busy being nice they forget that they are in the race.

Why do assholes always get the pretty girls?

i never met a asshole that wasn't good in the sac. enough said.

Why does a pretty girl never give a normal guy the time of day?

we do. i do. well...i have never met a normal guy who wanted to give me the time of day. there's nothing more boring than normalcy. maybe you should stop being normal. stop it!

Why is a man judge by what he wears?

we are all judged by what we wear. get used to it. or stop caring about what you wear, that way you could care less about who's judging you.

Most guys I know that have nice things really have nothing?

not a question, but i agree with you. you can't fill your hollowness with stuff...

most guys who are ballers are really struggling, most guys who wine and dine categorize their women like if they were objects.......ok...just sitting here killing a lil time:)

well thanks for stoping by love!

I've worked hard this year, will I get a decent raise?

yes, just keep working hard...not too hard. work as hard as they pay you.

Will the war in the middle east blow up before it gets any better ?

what war in the middle east? which war in the middle east? just kidding. it will. i hope, i pray it does.

I think I've gained about 10 lbs in the last 6 months, how long will it take me to lose those 10?

well love, it took you six months to gain the weight, so it should take you three months to lose it. i'm using the break up rules. break up with someone: it takes half the time of your relationship with that person to get over them. it's all dead weight.

Are you psychic?

i'd like to believe i am. i have de ja vu alot...

Do women feel like men are constantly checking them out?

yes love, i do. then there are times, when i'm like damn, why aren't men looking at me, then i look and i spy one. looking at me. and then i'm fine again.

why someone as intelligent as you still single?

ask the idiots that have dissed me. i don't really know. i'm sure those friggin' idiots know though.

Hey! I had to ask you what you think bout dating someone younger? Btw i think you got beautiful lips :)

thanks my love, i think dating someone who is younger is cool, as long as they are not too young. old enough to vote and drink is a good pre-req, that way you can stay out of the slammer. being almost 30...i can't see myself being with someone who is 19...although i did date a 19 year old a while back. and he was pretty okay. dating all kinds of people helps define your taste.

How many men have you been with?

20-something. in the early somethings.i went to college in San Francisco.

Does penis size matter to you, and if so, what is the best size?

penis size does matter. sorry fellas, it does. if you have alot of motion in your ocean that helps too, more bounce to the ounce, i mean inch, helps too. powerful tongues make up for wee ones. strong hands, a gentle touch helps too. it's not all about the penis, build up your other talents.

Do you have any secrets your best friend doesn't know about, and that would include a fantasy or two?

yes i do who doesn't. way more than two.

Are you hung up on any ex of yours?

no. not anymore. there's always one person to be hung up on in your life. i don't have any new break ups to be hung up about.

Do UFO's exist?

of course they do, it's narcisistic and a waste of time to believe that earth is the only place where living organisms exist and that we have never been visited.

Hello, answer girl. i have a question. why is it so hard to find single female musician?

i am single female muscian...kind of i know like 5 chords on the guitar...still training myself, i guessed that could be said about me, pertaining to the different phases in my life. anyway, maybe it's where you live...in the bay area you couldn't swing a wet cat without hitting at least four chick musicians...venture out they are around. i would try a coffee shop open mic night, or a pj harvey, alicia keys, fiona apple concert.

No comments:

Post a Comment

give me a Q. i'll give you an A.